So, this has been building up inside me and I just need to rant. I might explode if I just don’t yell about it online.
I work in the richest area in the suburbs of the city I live in. I mean, most of these people swim in money, sleep in money beds, and are basically so pretentious most of them aren’t real people. Anyway, I teach swim lessons for these suburb-people. I’m a full-time pool rat and I’ve been teaching and lifeguarding for 9 years. There have been some major changes to the place that I work and I was given the Jr. Swim Club. The Jr. Swim Club has always just been a big Level 5 and 6 swim lesson. They do some drills, play around, do some more swimming, and then work on dives and flip turns. It’s always been pretty chill and the swimmers have been taught by the same guy for many, many years.
Well, this man, a chill guy in his forties, couldn’t do the swim club anymore so they gave it to me. I was pretty excited because I was a competitive swimmer for 12 years and I was the assistant coach for a Chicago YMCA swim team for 2 years. So, I ran the swim club on Monday and Thursday last week…and worked their asses off. We did laps, drills, sprints, more drills, and lots of stroke technique. Quite different than what most of the kids were used to.
The Thursday Jr. Swim Club consists mostly of girls, ages 8-13. There are five boys on the team around 9-14. The boys were completely out of control. The moment they stepped onto the pool deck, they approached with caution and stared at me, completely in disbelief that a female was their new coach. When I asked their names, they instantly began to switch names and refused to tell me who was who. So I told them to get in the water. It took them about ten minutes to finally get in a lane while all the girls had settled and were ready to start. The practice was difficult as none of the boys listened, they ignored me and went under water as I spoke to them, and even did things I was telling them not to do as I stood there yelling at them. They pushed, kicked, and jumped on each other, running into other swimmers the whole time. They complained, bitched, and were just absolutely rude. Beyond rude.
So…about two days later, my new Aquatics Director called. We talked about the upcoming week and then she brought up the Jr. Swim Club. She was confused and perplexed because a team of “concerned” mothers called her complaining that there sons were bored. Yep. Bored. They didn’t like swimming laps or having to work. And they especially didn’t like working with girls and there were too many “little girls” on the Jr. Swim Club. They had more fun with their old coach.
Instead of responding like a normal parent would or should, saying something like, “Oh hey, maybe you shouldn’t be a sexist, spoiled little shit and respect your new coach,” they told the aquatic director that A. Jr. Swim Club NEEDS to be more fun for their sons. B. Maybe they should find a new coach that actually knows how to make their sons happy. C. If these changes are not made, their sons will be leaving the Jr. Swim Club.
….AAAHHRAGGSGHSDBGEGWERGW!!! Are you fucking kidding me!!?!?!? What the fuck is wrong with these parents?? Why the fuck are you listening to your 9…10 year-old-sons after ONE fucking swim practice whining about how much it sucks that their new GIRL coach is actually making them work!?! And I know this has nothing to do with their sons being bored. It has everything to do with these MOMS looking for some reason to remove the female coach from the scene. Look ladies, it’s impossible to control your sons because they’re spoiled-rotten, nasty, disrespectful, rich, pompous shits. I yelled, I sat them out, I gave them some free swim, I let them do some jumps, I separated them—nothing. If they have made the decision to not listen or not try….THEY’RE NOT GOING TO! Jesus Christ. Fuck. I’m pissed.
So my boss, instead of telling them, “Oh well. We made the decision to actually make this into a swim team now, there’s the door,” apologized to them and is putting one of my male co-workers in charge so he can teach the boys and I can teach the girls. Do you know how bad this makes me look? The 10-kid team does not need two coaches!! And I just know these boys will be on their best behavior for him. And that’s going to drive me fucking crazy. So, I think I’m just going to give the whole team to him and be done with it after just one week. Fuck these damn, rich, suburban parents and their little shit-head sons.